Two Lives
by silvershewolf1
Summary: AN story going under changes i will leave this one for you all to read but i will go thourgh and change the chapters i read through it all and it annoyed me at how much they make up so i will change it around a bit and take out a lot of the making bits...
1. Two Lives

_Two Lives_

"Miss Evens. Please would you kindly tell me why is it these floors are not swept properly?" Lord Potter asked as he walked slowly into the cold kitchen.

Lily Evens a young sixteen year old girl with lovely red hair and emerald green eyes was on her knees scrubbing the cold hard stone floor.

"I am sorry Lord Potter" Lily said as she got to her feet but kept her eyes to the floor. "I had to get every thing done in an hour or I would be flogged." Lily said sounding a little chocked as though she had been crying.

Lord Potter was shocked by this. "Flogged by whom may I ask?" He lifted her head up slightly and wiped away the tears running down her checks.

"I dare not say my Lord because of his class in society." Lily answered as she trembled.

"I demand you tell me at once Miss Evens. I will have no female servant punished in this household" Lord Potter said starting to get annoyed with the girl in front of him self.

"Master James" she mumbled. Lord Potter placed his hands back down at his side stormed out of the room "JAMES" He called out to his son but got no response from him.

A shape shifted in the shadows and James walked out and towards Lily but she was unaware that he was there. He placed his arms around her waist and started kissing her neck.

"Warren. I have told you already im working." Lily said as she stood there and tilted her head to the side to allow him to get at her neck properly.

"Lily" A voice whispered behind her.

A young man walked into the room and stood there with a look of shock on his face.

"Cedric" Lily looked at him confused. "If your there then who is behind me." She pulled the hands off her waist and turned around to look.

Lily screamed. James put his hand over her mouth and told her to hush. If Lord Potter had come in and saw James hugging and kissing Lily he would be banished from the house hold. James roughly 6ft and had messy black hair and melted chocolate eyes.

_

* * *

Flash back._

"_James Potter I will get you for putting mud in my hair" A voice yelled at the thirteen year old boy who was running away after putting mud in a thirteen year old girl's hair._

"_Well if you catch me I will kiss you and if not I will put more mud in your hair." The boy yelled back behind him, Lily and James have been friends ever since the day Lily came to work for his father._

"_You know James that does not work and made no sense. Admit it James you just want to kiss me" Lily yelled at him once she stopped chasing James._

"_Made sense to me and maybe I do and may be I don't Lily or I just want to put more mud in your hair." James stopped and looked behind him to see Lily had stopped and was now sitting on the ground crying. He cautiously walked up to her. "Lily im sorry" James sat down._

_Lily looked up and. Squelch. She put mud in his hair. "I do believe I have caught you James now you owe me a kiss." Lily Smiled as James gave her a kiss on her check._

_Lily turned her head to talk to him but he had other ideas. He put his hands on either side of her face and puller her closer to him self then kissed her lips and got up and ran away before she could hit him for it._

"_JAMES." Lily got up and ran after him she would have caught him if it weren't for the fact she could not go into his room unless invited by him. _

_James' door opened and to annoy her he stayed on the other side and did not invite her in but that did not stop Lily "You can't come into my room with out being invited Lily" _

_She just walked in "Well yes I can you opened your door to allow me in" She kissed him and before she could leave he shut the door on her._

"_James what are you doing?" Lily asked a little shocked._

_James walked over to her and pulled her close to him self. "Well Lily what im doing is hugging you."_

"_James where are friends nothing more." Lily said as she pushed out of his arms and walked to the door but before she left she said. "Please I don't want to hurt you or get hurt I just want to be your friend that is all." Lily walked out and went to her little corner of the house that she lived in._

_End flash back._

* * *

"JAMES." Lord Potter called out to his son. "Oh where is that boy." He said as he walked around his home looking for James.

Lily walked through the front door with a bunch of flowers in each hand. "Excuse me, Lord Potter which roses would you like to have on the table the red ones or the green ones?"

"The green ones if you please. You can give the red ones to my son if you know where he is and he can do as he wishes with them." Lord Potter told Lily.

"Yes sir I will do as you have asked" Lily curtsied slightly before leaving to go down to the well where James was sitting.

"James. I mean Master Potter." James turned around to look at who had just called him. "Your father requested that I give you these roses to you and that you can do what you want with them." She bent down and handed him the roses and became lost in the depths of his brown eyes. Lily stood up and started to walk away when a hand grasped hers.

"Please stay with me I do not wish to be alone at this present time." James pulled her to the ground but she did not hit it instead she was sitting in James lap. Lily squirmed as he put his arms around her waist so she could not escape.

"Please Master James let me go and I will stay with you" James leaned his head on her shoulder. "Master James what is wrong?" Lily asked a little shocked by this.

"It is just I have feelings for some one but I am unable to tell her how I feel. How do I do it with out hurting her?" he asked now looking into Lily's eyes.

Lily thought for a minute. "Well you could leave gifts or invite her to the ball. You can even." Lily paused to stop her self from smiling.

"I can even what?" James asked but seeing the look in her eyes he nodded and understood what she meant. He leaned forward and gave her a kiss on her check. "Thank you"

They sat there in the grass by the well and looking out into the garden James was watching Lily out of the corner of his eye. He just watched the way the wind blew the hair out of her face and it trailed behind her.

* * *

Lily was in the ball room preparing it for the Christmas ball that night. She swept the floor, cleaned the windows and put the food out. An hour later she had finished putting every little detail together and then went to her room. James had asked his father to give her a room to her self because she was the only female servant in the whole house and because no one ever used it anyway. 

Lily walked into her little room that is furnished with a four poster bed but no drapes on it, a small desk and chair in the corner and she also had an oil lamp hanging up beside her bed. There on the end of her bed was a box and a bunch of roses. In the roses there an invitation to the ball and in the box a lovely green dress as well as a white mask.

Later that night Lily put her hair up in a bun with some tresses hanging down through out it she painted her lips a rose crimson she wore no other make up on her face at all. She made her way down the stairs and stopped when every one stopped what they were doing and looked at her. James looked up from talking to his father and smiled because he recognized the dress at once. He walked over to the stairs and offered his hand Lily took it. He felt her trembling as he walked her over to the wall to talk.

"Ah I see you got the dress." James said as he leaned against the wall and slid his arm around her waist.

Lily leaned her head against his shoulder. "Thank you." She said with a smile.

"No problem." James said as he kissed her hair. "Come on lets go for a walk." He moved his arm from her waist and took her hand.

"For a walk?" Lily asked as she held his hand

James led her to the garden near the well and he leaned against the stone of the well with Lily leaning against him.

Lily began speak. "I used to have this dream where I would be next to water fall in a small field of flowers. There is a man there but I am unable to see his face." Lily raised her hand and covered her mouth because she had just told him her dream.

James laughed "you don't have to be ashamed of telling me about your dream." She turned her head but before she could reply he was kissing her softly. Lily did not want it to stop so she deepened the kiss. Once they pulled away from each other she licked her lips James could not help him self he leaned forwards and kissed her again and ran his tongue over her lips. He pulled away once he realized what he had just done but Lily just leaned onto him and licked his lips not knowing what it did to him but she sure felt it.

James pulled of her mask and kissed her check Lily closed her eyes as he moved from her check to her neck as he pulled of his mask. Lily opened her eyes and kissed him she looked into his eyes. Brown! She pulled away and looked at his face.

"James" she gasped out. She pulled his arms off her self and got up and started to walk away.

"Lily wait." He touched her arm but that did not stop her she just ran. She stopped before the door and looked behind her at James just standing there in shock.

"I'm sorry." Lily whispered before walking though the door and into the ball room. She had let her feelings slip and so did he. James looked at her hair and saw it a rose not just any rose the rose he gave her.

James walked into the ball room and looked around for her and saw her laughing while she danced with Master Sirius Black. James walked over and put his hand on Sirius' back.

Sirius turned around and did a slight bow "Master James. My friend." he said as he took James' hand. Lily realized that they were friends and she let go of Sirius and she ran towards the stairs James ran after her and grabbed her hand.

James' father looked up from talking to see James chasing a young girl and saw the girl started to go up the stairs she turned as James grasped her arm. "Lily" He whispered. "My son is in love"

Lily twisted her arm in his firm grip. "Lily im sorry" he said as he tightened his grip on her.

"LET ME GO JAMES POTTER" Lily yelled at him.

Smack.

James had let his temper go on Lily

"It is Master James to you." He scowled at Lily pointing his finger at her.

Lily turned and looked at him with tears running down her checks and blood dripping from her lip where he had hit her. "No James if you were sorry you would not have hit me just now." She trembled and looked at him and he looked back and let go now realizing he had now caused his best friend to tremble and fear him.

"Lily" he whispered. Lily ran up the stairs and to her room James was close behind her she shut her door. James opened the door and stood there as he saw her pull out her hair and cry on her desk for a little bit then James knocked on the door.

Lily looked up and wiped her eyes and said. "What can I do for you James?"

"Please forgive me." He walked over to her and kissed her on the check.

"Get out James" she demanded. "I do not care if you hit me again then I will truly know you don't care about me any more."

Sirius walked into the room and over to Lily. "Lily would you like to accompany down stairs for a dance?" Lily stood up and walked out of the room with him and left James there to think about what she said.

_

* * *

Flash back_

"_James you take care of Lily she is going to live here and work for us but you can play with her" Lord Potter told his son._

"_Hello Lily im James" He said as he took her hand and kissed it._

_Lily pulled her hand away a little shocked by this. "Hell… hello James."_

"_Do you want to go play with me" James asked as he grabbed Lily's hand and took her out side to play with him. They went to the barn and played hide and seek Lily won because she was very good at hiding. Then James said "how about we play catch and kiss."_

"_Ok" Lily said with a smile. James was up first and he had to try to catch Lily which proved to be harder that it appeared because she kept climbing on things to get away from him._

"_Not fare I rule no climbing on any thing" James grumbled._

"_But you a faster runner than I am James." Lily said as she jumped off the hay stack._

"_That is the whole point" James said as he now had Lily cornered he walked up to her and trapped her. He kissed her and to her surprise she wrapped her arms around his neck as he turned around so that he was leaning against the hay instead of Lily. Lily Pulled away _

"_Thank you. You just made a way for me to get away" she said as she ran._

_James was shocked by this and then he ran after her. "I will get you Lily Evens" he caught her again and kissed her as he did he put his dirty hands onto her clean nearly dress. _

James thought back to that day and what he did. Then he thought back to when they were thirteen and what she had said to him she did not want to hurt him or get hurt and he had just done exactly that he had hurt her.

Later that night "Lily would you take some water to James and tell him good night" Lord Potter said to Lily as he walked past her room.

"Yes sir" Lily answered. She groaned as she got up of her bed and touched her lip.

"Sir" she said as she knocked on James' door. The door opened and James stood there with nothing on not expecting it to be Lily at his door. He blushed and shut the door but soon opened it with his pants on.

"Yes Miss evens?" James asked as Lily looked at the floor trying to hide her smile.

"Your father asked me to get you some thing to drink would you like to follow me please?"

Lily started to walk away when James ran past her and tagged her and said "Now you got to try to get me for once and kiss me."

"James Potter I will not kiss you because I can't run as fast as you" Lily yelled after him.

James stopped at her words. "But you will kiss me?"

Lily just walked past him trying to ignore that question. "I will neither confirm nor dismiss that." James walked in front of her she did not know this until she almost fell backwards but he caught her and pulled her into his arms.

"See you caught me. I want my Kiss." James said as he smiled at her.

"Oh James will you ever learn." She whispered as she kissed not his check nor his lips but his neck. James was shocked by this and let her go. She walked to the kitchen with a smile on her face. James followed still shocked by her kissing his neck.

"Lily can we please be friends again?" James asked with hope in his eyes.

"Yes" Lily answered quietly. A she got James a drink and kissed his neck as she left him there by him self once again.

* * *

(A/N Hope you like this story I fixed it up a bit so there is a little new stuff and some old stuff is gone. Off now until the next chapter) 


	2. Not What It Appears

_Not What It Appears _

_Lily's Prov_

_This is so not good I want to be close but this is not what I meant, serving James personally is fine but he being aloud to do as he wishes with me is not such a good thing for me. I still have a scare from the split lip I hate it you can see it so perfectly. This dress is killing me I hate showing off my legs. I think I will put my hair up into a bun or leave it down… down will do… but all in all it is as if James has forgotten how to feel about any one, I feel his kiss all the time it never goes away from me._

_I woke the other night and just lay there starring at the decorations on the ceiling and I swear some one was standing at my door watching me but when I sat up they were gone was it a dream or reality._

_End Prov_

* * *

Being personal property was not all that bad for Lily she did not have to do as much, she just had to do every thing James said not matter what she thought about it after all she is only property to a male in this male ruled world. 

Lily sighed and took a deep breath and knocked on the door. "James I have a drink for you."

"Please come in" James said as he got up and opened the door for the person behind it. James eyes widened as he looked at what Lily was wearing she was doing as James had told her to do. She was wearing a knee high black dress with lace up around the top.

"Lily." James gulped down air trying to contain him self. "I mean Miss Evens, you look lovely ever so stunning. Would you mind if I painted a portrait of you, if you don't mind?"

"Yes, you can paint a portrait of me." Lily answered.

"Miss Evens if you go to my cupboard and inside you will find a dress. I would like you to wear it please." James asked Lily. Lily did as she was asked and went to the cupboard and got the dress out and she turned around tears welled up in her eyes. The dress was the green one she wore that night.

"Master Potter" but James stopped her.

"Please call me James at this present time." James told her.

"Mast... I mean James where do I get changed?" Lily asked as she looked around.

"Right there in front of me" James said with a greedy look in his eyes. Lily glared at him but she did as she was asked but she turned around so that James could only see her back and not her breasts but that did not stop James. He walked up to her and picked her up and placed her on his bed and draped a silk sheet over lower half of her body. Then went behind her he took of his shirt and started to give her a shoulder massage.

Lily leant back a bit, she let out a slight moan at the feeling of his hands making there way down her back. He leaned down and gave her neck a kiss her whole body started to tingle with the sensation of his kiss. James smiled against her neck. Lily moved and it disturbed him, she pulled the blanket up over her self and stood up.

James looked at her back as he stood up he moved her hair out of the way and gave her neck a little kiss as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders.

Lily bowed her head. "I can't do this James" Getting out of his arms she walked to where she had put her dress and picked it up, she slipped it over her head and dropped the sheet then slipped her shoes back on. She walked towards the door James griped her arm and pulled her back towards himself. Lily kept her head down so James gently lifted her head to look at him.

"I am really sorry Lily." He leaned her back a bit as he smiled at her. A single tear rolled down her cheek and landed on his sleeve.

"I am sorry for every thing I have said to you, that night a month ago I can not tell you how much I was shocked by you but to make it worse you hit me" Lily looked at James and she leaned up towards him and did what he did not expect at all she licked his lips and ran her fingers through his hair.

James lifted his arms and pulled her dress up and over her head. Lily stood on the heel of her shoe and pulled it off she did it with the other one as well. James threw the dress some where behind him not paying much attention to where it landed.

"Lily." James gasped out as Lily kissed him. James lifted Lily up to his height and he kissed her as she kissed his neck. Lily wrapped her legs around his waist and she felt him harden under her.

"James are you sure no one will come in?" Lily asked as she looked at the door.

"Yes, I have locked the door." James told Lily.

Lily took her arms from around his neck and ran them down his body. James shivered as she did so, Lily just smiled because this amused her. James turned around so that he could sit on his bed with Lily sitting on him. Lily put her knees either side of James. She now had the silk sheet wrapped around her again and then she put her arms around his neck and the sheet wrapped around him as well.

"James we really should not do this but I want to. What if you get caught with me I'm nothing more than a servant." Lily said.

James looked up and kissed her check. "Lily I do no care if I get caught I'm with the one I love. I only want you no one else." Lily smiled at him as he lied down and Lily was now on top of him. He kissed her and played with her body. He sat up after a while with her still sitting on him. James stood up holding on to Lily he pulled the blankets back and laid her down he then stood up and started pulling off his pants. Lily lay there with a smile on her face he climbed into the bed and pulled the covers over himself.

"Lily tell me are you comfortable with this or do you want me to stop?" James asked.

Lily closed her eyes and nodded. "Yes im sure." She opened her eyes they were not emerald green there were now dark very dark.

He closed his eyes and slid into her and aloud Lily to adjust then he broke through. Before he could block her cries and she dug her nails into his back

"Sorry that I can not make it stop hurting you Lily but I will go slowly till you get used to It." he leaned forward and kissed her as he got into a slow rhythm. There were names being called and panting. James rolled over and brought Lily with him so she was now on top once again. Lily stopped and just rested her whole body on him.

* * *

Lily was laying on her bed a week later thinking about James and her self. There was a knock at the door. Lily smiled as she opened the door but she soon lost it as a young girl stood there and not whom she had expected. 

"Can I help you Miss?" Lily asked.

"Um yes you can. May I come in?" the girl asked.

Lily opened the door for the girl to come in. "so what can I do for you?" Lily looked at the girl.

"Well im to marry Master Potter" the girl said "so I kneed to know about both of the family."

"Very well Miss." Lily said. The young girl left Lily's room two hours later. After the girl left Lily realized that she had said she is to marry Master Potter. James. Lily fell to her knees and cried. She got up a while later and packed her bags with all her clothes and she walked to James room and put the green dress on his bed with a letter.

At dinner James sat there as his father entered and sat at his place at the head of the table. "James where is Lily will she be joining us for dinner?"

"I do not know father." James said as he winced as a chair was pulled out opposite him and a young girl sat down.

A servant came in and whispered into Lord Potter ear that Lily was gone along with all her stuff. Lord Potter got up and whispered into James ear. "Did you not tell Lily about your arranged marriage?"

"No I did not" James mumbled. Lord Potter hit his son over the back of the head. "But father I do not know whom im to marry." James said as he grasped the back of his head.

"Lily. You are supposed to marry Lily." Lord Potter started to walk away.

"Then father who is she?" James pointed at the young girl.

"This is my wife to be and your new mother." Lord Potter beckoned to the girl and they left the room.

James thought about places that Lily told him about and then he remembered her dream. This place had to be real James thought as he got up and walked to his room to find the dress and the letter.

_Dear Master James_

_I am writing you this letter in hopes you find it after I have left your house. I will not lie to you I might not come back. I do hope you are happy with you new wife. Where will I go you wonder, I will go to my child hood home._

_If you do want to find me all you have to do is look. I will not hid and if you do come for me I will be so happy and if not im sorry to say but I can not lie to my self any more I did love you but now im not so sure._

_Signed_

_Lily Evens. _

James read the last line over and over again as tears ran down his checks. He ran to Lilly's room and looked out the window. There he saw a shadow walking down the path James grabbed a coat for him self and ran out side and down the path but he did not say any thing the just followed the girl whom happened to be Lily he walked silently behind her.

Lily ducked through into a cave James followed her at a distance so that she would not see him. She slipped through a crack just big enough for James to get through .Lily walked over to a Bed and climbed on to it and she cried and cried. James hid in the shadows until she stopped so that she could let it out.

Lily sat up and yelled at the top of her lungs. "JAMES I LOVE YOU".

James stood up. "I love you to Lily Evens." James whispered from where he was.

Lily screamed.

"James is that really you or my imagination?" Lily looked at the person, well shadow at the end of the bed.

"No Lily it is me im here to be with you." James said as he walked around to Lily's side and put his coat over her. And picked her up and held her in his arms she cried and cried.

"James you lied to me" Lily said as he put her back down

"No I did not I didn't tell you of the marriage till I new whom I was supposed to marry.

"Well who are you supposed to marry then James Potter?" Lily asked as she looked him in the eyes.

"Well Miss Evens" James leaned forward and kissed her. "Im to marry you."

Lily looked up at him and smiled before she jumped into his arms and kissed him.

James and Lily stayed at the old house for several days and they were telling each other what it was like before Lily moved in with him.

_

* * *

Flash back._

_James and Lily are out in the barn like they always are. There just sitting there talking but James wants to do some thing else. They are now fourteen._

"_James if I was to tell you some thing serious would you laugh or take is seriously?" Lily asked him._

"_It depends on weather it seems serious to me or not." James smiled as Lily folded her arms over her chest. "Ok ask me or tell me and I will do either."_

"_Well would you ever hurt me James? If not would you protect me from those who would try to hurt me?" Lily asked she seemed to worry about the answer._

"_Lily if I ever hurt you I would never forgive my self. I will always protect you." James said as he got to his knees and crawled over to Lily and kissed her. Lilly put her arms around his neck and kissed him back._

_End flash back._

* * *

Lord Potter walked over to his son and Lily and hugged them and gave Lily a kiss on her check. 

"Welcome back Lily." Lord Potter said.

"Thank you Lord Potter." Lily smiled as James slid his arm around her waist as a comfort for her.

James whispered into her ear. "Im here for you Lily no matter what I will never leave you I love you."

"Thank you." She whispered back to him.

That night Lily walked slowly to her room and climbed into her bed and fell asleep. After a while she felt some one climb in and curl up behind her. She rolled over to look at the person. It was James Lily smiled and moved closer to him she could smell his scent and she fell asleep in his arms and he fell asleep smelling her hair. The next morning James and Lily went out side and to the barn. James smiled cheekily.

"Lily, do you want to play a game?" He asked as she sat down.

"What game James?" Lily looked at him and his grin.

"How about catch and kiss?" James smiled at Lily.

"Do you ever tier of that game?" James just smiled at her. "I will take that as a no."

They played for hours until the both became tied and fell asleep in the hay Lily leaned on James. They both woke up after dark and the laughed because they had missed dinner.

"Come on we better go to bed." James told Lily as they got up.

"Ok James." Lily got up and helped him up. On the way to the house James picked Lily up and spun her around and she giggled for joy like a child.


	3. Liar

_Liar _

"Lily do you remember Master Sirius Black from the ball?" James asked Lily.

"Yes I do. I kept him company that night because you hurt me." Lily looked away as James winced at her remarks.

"Yes I remember that you did. Well he is coming to stay for a month." James said and he saw Lily brighten up after remembering that night.

"He is that's good I can get to know him a bit better because I was kind of rude to him." Lily walked out of James room.

James turned around to go to his window when he was attacked from behind he spun around but was not able to get the person of his back. He got kissed on the neck and he stopped because only one person did that to him. Lily jumped off and ran to her room to get changed.

Sirius Black came that after noon and Lily and James greeted him. James shock his friends hand and Lily game him a kiss on the check. Sirius smiled at Lily. Sirius was wearing a white shirt, black pants and a long black over coat.

"Please Miss Evens call me Sirius." Lily smiled.

"Then im to have you call me by my first name." Lily said as she led him to his room. He walked in and invited her in after him "Let me know if you need any thing at all Sirius." Lily walked out of the room.

Sirius unpacked all his belongings and got settled in until there was a knock at his door.

"Sirius it is dinner time please follow me down stairs." Lily opened his door to find him smiling at her.

"Thank you Lily." He followed her to dinner and sat on the opposite side of the table to her.

James finished his dinner and excused him self to go do some work his father excused him self as well and all that remained behind was Lily and Sirius. They talked for so long and then Lily had to excuse her self because she had to go wash up for bed. Sirius said his good nights at her door then went to his room.

The next morning Lily woke early and she started her chorus before every one got up and told her not to. She walked back to her room and made her bed and then just lay there reading because at James request that she be taught to read so she did some reading every morning. After lunch Lily went for a walk through the garden she saw Sirius going for a walk as well so she snuck up behind him and put her hands over his eyes. Sirius pulled her hands off his eyes then turned around Lily laughed at the look on his face.

"Lily you startled me." Sirius laughed.

"I scarred you?" she smiled as she walked with him around the garden.

A week later and the night before

James was sitting in the parlour drinking a lot of alcohol. And Sirius was sitting in there with him trying to tell him to stop.

"James please stop or you will do something you will regret." Sirius said.

"Hic… like… Hic… what?" James asked his friend.

"You could hurt Lily"

"Lily… Hic… I would never… Hic… Hic… hurt her." James said as he stood up and fell back down into the chair. He finally managed to get up and walk out of the room and up the stairs he passed some one who gave him a kiss but did not know who it was they were a blur.

The next morning Lily was happy to receive a letter form her aunt saying that Lily was now able to get her inheritance that her parents left when they died. Lily ran to James room knocked but did not wait for an answer she opened the door but stopped at what she saw. James with another girl the girl sat up as James sat up still on top of her. Lily recognized the girl it was Lord Potter's wife. Lily ran out of the room. James was unaware that Lily saw this but the girl did and said nothing.

James spun around as the door slammed shut. "Shit. Who was that?"

"Oh just that servant girl you like." The young girl said.

James turned his head to look at her. "WHAT?" James climbed out of the bed and got his pants on and ran over to the door and staggered as he did so. He ran down the stairs and looked around for Lily and then thought about going into the barn.

Lily ran to the barn to hide form every thing but she found Sirius there. She is about to run out of there to go some where else but she was pulled back to him.

"Miss Evens. I mean Lily are you alright?" he asked looking a little shocked

Lily stopped and turned around Sirius saw her crying. "No im not alright Master Sirius." Lily said as she slumped to the floor.

Sirius pulled her to her feet carefully. "Lily, would you care to dance with me?"

"But there is no music to dance to." Lily frowned as he walked over to a hay stack and then music began to play. Sirius turned around and offered his hand Lily accepted and they began to dance.

James goes out to the barn he stops because he hears the music. James looks through a hole in the wall and sees the two of them dancing. Sirius stopped and looked down at Lilly. Lily looked up at him and smiles he can't hold it in any more he leans down and kisses her. James comes running in and punches Sirius in the nose.

"STOP JAMES STOP." Lily yelled as she fell down because James pushed her out of his way. Lily hit her head on the ground. She sees James and Sirius fighting then it all went black.

James and Sirius did not notice this at all.

"HOW DARE YOU KISS HER." James yelled.

"WELL WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MAKE HER RUN OUT HERE TO THE BARN." Sirius yelled just as loud.

James turned when he heard a voice behind him

"James come back to bed." James turned around and glared at her.

"NO" he yells. The girl just turns and walks away. He turns around.

Smack.

James was on the ground. Sirius looked around to see if Lily had run away but found her on the ground unconscious. Sirius picks Lily up and carries her to her room and then gets a cloth and a bowl of water. He sat on her bed and dabbed her with the wet cloth. Her eyes fluttered open.

"Sirius are you alright? Why are you treating me?" Lily asked just those two questions.

Sirius laughed. "Im glade to see you are alright. Now how many fingers am I holding up?"

Lilly looked at him for a bit. "You are holding up four. Now stay still I will clean that blood of your face." Lily took the cloth of him and began to clean his face. James walked in to find Sirius and Lily laughing about it all.

"Oh hello Master Potter." Both Lily and Sirius said at the same time and then they both fell of the bed laughing. Lily had landed on top of Sirius. She was very red in the face because she was laughing so hard and then because of being on top of Sirius.

"Lily are you alright?" Sirius asked.

"Im still a bit dizzy from me hitting my head." Lily laughed and fell over again this time James ran over to her and was about to help her up when.

Smack.

She hit him. "What the hell was that for?" James glared at Sirius because he fell over when Lily hit him. Sirius just laughed.

"Well I think you would be able to guess. She is going to be your mother and you had."

Sirius walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her. She turned in his arms and cried. "Yes mate she saw you." Sirius said to James. "Lily shall we go for a walk?"

"We shall." They walked out of the room and laughed. Later they came back and sat down at the dinner table next to each other. The young girl sat next to James and slid her hand in between his legs James got to his feet and walked out of the room.

Lily and Sirius were sitting out in the barn talking about lots of things.

"Hey Lily did you want to stay at my place for a couple of weeks." Sirius asked Lily as she was walking around trying to makes sense of ever thing that has happened lately.

"Would that be intruding on you?" Lily stopped and looked at him.

"No not at all. It would be good to have you there." Sirius smiled.

James walked into the barn. "Lily can I talk to you please?"

"Yes you may Master James." Lily smiled as Sirius smirked because she deliberately called him master.

Lily got up from where she was now sitting. She walked out of the barn with such grace James just followed saying nothing.

"Lily im sorry about ever thing I have ever done to hurt you." James looked at Lily in her eyes.

"Liar" Lily whispered as she looked away from his eyes.

"Im not" James said.

Lily looked at him. "How am I to believe what you tell me like you told me you loved me." James just stared. "Sorry mister Potter until such time as when I can believe you I will be living with Master Sirius." She turned and walked away.

"So what did he say?" Lily smiled at Sirius because he cares for her.

"He says he is sorry for every thing. But I do not believe him at all. How do I know he won't do it again?" Lily started to walk out of the barn.

"Lily, where are you going?" Sirius asked as he got up.

Lily turned around and looked at him confused. "Did you not say I was able to say at your house? Well I have accepted. So I am on my way to pack my clothes." Lily smiled.

"Oh yes I did say that" Sirius followed her to her room.

She turned around. "You may come in Sirius."

"Thank you. I know my place not to walk into a ladies room unless invited." Sirius walked in and stood there. "Do you have any bags or stuff you would like me to carry?"

"Not at this present time. I think I can manage at the moment." Lily looked at him. Sirius looked taken back by this.

"Are you sure?" Sirius still wanted to help but was unable if the lady refused to take it.

"Yes im sure. Your so sweet James never says that." Lily Looked at her door as it opened and James walked in.

"Lily you are forbidden to leave this house with out a male escort." James seemed so serious now because Lily was about to leave.

"I do have an escort. Sirius would you carry this for me it is too heavy." Lily looked from James to Sirius.

"I would be glade to miss." Lily smiled as Sirius picked up the bag on her bed.

"Thank you." Lily looked at James. "See this is one thing you never would do for me." At those words she walked out of the room.

_Flash back _

"_Hey James?" Sirius looked at James. _

"_Yes?" James looked up at him._

"_Who is the girl that works for your family?" Sirius asked shyly _

"_Her name is Lily Evens. And she has been here since last year." James looked at the girl who walked into the room with drinks for the two boys and then left again._

"_She is lovely. I think she is beautiful." Sirius looked at the girl as she left hoping she would look at him and then she did she turned around and smiled at him._

"_You have a crush on her don't you?" James laughed._

"_So what at least I have not kissed her." Sirius snicked at the look on James face._

_James Picked up a chair and snapped the leg of and started to chase him around trying to hit him because of what he said. Sirius stopped and poked his tongue out and then._

_Wack._

_James hit him in the shin._

"_OUCH YOU BASTARD" Sirius hobbled around and then fell over at some ones feet._

"_Master James what did you hit him for?" Lily asked as she helped Sirius up of the floor._

"_It is none of your business." James growled at Lily._

_Lily glared at him as she took Sirius out of the room._

"_Oh come on Lily" James stood there alone._

_End flash back._

"My friend, how can he do this to me?" James looked at Lily's bed and jumped as a voice behind him told him why.

"You have always done some thing to hurt Lily my friend. Did you not promise her that you would never hurt her?" Sirius walked over to his friend and looked at him.

"Yes I did but it has nothing to do with you." James hissed.

Sirius walked out of the room. James heard neighing as the carriage left. James walked over to the window and watched as Lily looked back up at him and he saw her mouth I Love You James. James bowed his head and cried.

They rode in the carriage for an hour before they arrived at Sirius' estate. Sirius shows Lily to her room then around the rest of the house and grounds. He told her she can go any where in the grounds and house. Now that Lily is there at Sirius home she felt safe and secure away from every thing.

It is three weeks till Christmas. All members of Sirius' family are invited to the annual Christmas ball held at the Potters and they can bring a guest if they do whish. Sirius decides to take Lily so she can see James again. Sirius bought Lily a new dress a nice black one.

"Lily are you ready to go?" Sirius called as he paced around waiting.

"Yes I am." Sirius turned around and looked up at her standing at the top of the stairs. She was wearing the dress, lips painted as red as a rose and her checks lightly dusted in a gold like substance. Sirius' mouth opened and he just stared at her as she came down the stairs.

"You look grate. Are you sure you will be able to handle seeing James?"

"Yes I will be able to handle him because I have poise and grace and I have you there for support." Lily stepped of the last step and they walked out the door to the carriage. Lily shivered not because of the cold but because she was going to a place she hardly knew any more. They arrived at the Potters estate. They were welcomed by James himself.

"Hello. Mater Sirius and Miss Lily please follow me." James just looked at Lily. They entered the ball room and there was no one else there yet. Or they appeared to not be there.

SURPRISE!

Lily screamed and jumped back into Sirius. Sirius laughed.

"It is ok Lily this ball is a Christmas one and for you as well." Sirius smiled.

"Why is it for me as well?" Lily asked a little confused.

"Well because you came to live with me for several months James wanted to make it up to you for what he did." Sirius looked at James as he kept his eyes to the ground.

Lily walked over to James and kissed his check he looked up and almost burst into tears at her touch.

"Im really sorry Lily I should never have done that to you." James kept looking at the ground.

"James please look at me." James looked up at Lily. "James I forgive you. I left here because I needed change of life for a while."

Lily placed her hand on his arm. James smiled and hugged her. Sirius looked shocked by this and left the room. Lily looked around for him to thank him for every thing. She walked out the front door to see him getting in his carriage.

"Sirius why are you leaving?" She ran up to the carriage and looked at him.

"Do you honestly think James is the only one to be in love with you?" Sirius looked away from her.

"Sirius im sorry I did not know." She opened the carriage door and climbed in she sat there opposite him.

He smiled at her then could not stop he leaned forward and kissed her she did not realise what she was doing in then end she wrapped her arms around his neck. James stood there at the carriage door and watched he saw Sirius kissed her and she did not know what she was doing. Sirius pulled away and Lily looked out the door and saw James she got out and walked back to the house with James.

"What else have you done with him?" James asked. He broke the silence as they walked to his room.

"Nothing more than he just kissed me." Lily Looked at James. "Do you not trust me?" Lily was about to walk away.

"I do trust you just not him." James walked into his room.

"Why do you not trust your best friend he took care of me when I was close to killing my self all because of you. He told me to forgive you because you were drunk and did not know what you were doing. And you still do not trust him?" Lily stepped into his room his bed had not been slept in for a while. "Have you not slept since I left?" Lily looked at him.

"No I have not slept just dozed off but could not sleep because for the months your were not here. You stayed in my head." James collapsed on his bed and just lay there.

Lily walked over him and sat down on the bed and put his head in her lap and ran her fingers through his hair with in minutes he was asleep and putting her leg to sleep. She lifted his head of her leg and left the room and walked to one that used to be hers and looked out the window.

"Lily are you ok?" A sleepy voice said behind her she spun around and looked at the person.

"James. I thought you were asleep." Lily walked over to him.

"I woke up just as you left." James stood there.

Lily put her arms around him and buried her head into his chest. "James I..I"

"Yes Lily?" James tilted her head up so she was able to look at him.

"Never mind it is nothing." Lily looked into his eyes and she smiled as she saw a million questions flicker across his eyes.

"Lily please tell me." James asked as he pulled her arms from of himself.

"It is nothing honest." Lily was shocked by him taking her arms of himself.

"Lily. I want to know some thing can you honestly saw that you love me again?" James was nerves about the answer.

"Yes I can answer that." James looked down at Lily.

"What is the answer?" James let go of her.

"I Love you James but if you do what you did again I will leave you for good." She walked over and sat on the bed James walked over to her and sat next to her.

"Lily I swear I will never do that again I can't get the sadness that you showed me out of my head." He took her hands in his own.

Lily looked up and kissed his check and wrapped her arms around his neck as he kissed her back but on her lips instead.


	4. Banished

_Disowned_

Sirius was pacing around his room at his estate and mumbling to himself. "Arr I can not like Lily she is my friend and James' wife to be. But I can not just forget about her." Sirius did not notice his door open.

"Forget about whom?" A nasty voice said behind him.

Sirius turned around and glared at his mother. "No one" Sirius did a small bow.

"If you have fallen in love with that Evens girl you will be disowned by this family and will be told to leave this life you live forever." Mrs Black smirked as she turned in a huff and walked out of the room to leave her son to think about what she said.

Sirius went to James' house and was talking to him.

"James if I told you some thing would you hit me or just listen?" Sirius looked at his friend.

"Well it would depend on what you tell me now." Sirius smiled at the answer.

"Well I like Lily." James raised his fist but dropped it as Lily walked into the room they were in.

"Oh sorry I will go I thought no one was in here." Lily left.

"Go on Sirius." James smiled.

"Well I don't just like her I love her but I know it will never be because she is to marry you." James looked at Sirius and put his hand on his friends shoulder.

"Well my friend there is nothing I can do about your feelings but knowing you, you will try." Sirius did a small laugh at this.

"Yes I would. But if I do not leave her alone I will be disowned by my family." James raised an eyebrow.

"But you could not care less could you?" James now took his hand of his friends shoulder.

"No I don't care but I will have no where to live." Sirius rolled his shoulders over.

"Hey if you still love Lily and they kick you out you can live here." James leaned against the wall.

"But I do love Lily and I will not just forget about her for the sake of having a home."

They did not know but just out side the door Lily was listening to every word and thought of how much control it took her not to just run and hug Sirius. She bit her lip and walked away from the door. The door opened and she spun around.

"Sirius do you really love me?" Lily asked Sirius. He looked away from her and to the floor.

"Yes I do love you Lily but I know you love James." He shifted his feet.

"I don't see why I cant I love you love you both." Lily walked over and lifted his head so he had to look at her.

James walked out after he heard this and saw. "Well Lily you have to choose one of us because you can not have both." James walked over to them.

"I love you both but im to marry James so im sorry Sirius but you will know I will always love both of you." Lily let go of Sirius and walked away her eyes full of unshed tears.

They both stood there in shock to see Lily just walk away with tears in her eyes and yet not cry at all. Later that day Sirius was back at his home and Lily came with him because he told her he wanted to be disowned by them so he would not have to live with them any more.

"Sirius are you sure about this?" Lily asked as she climbed into his bed and he climbed in after her.

"Yes im sure my mother will walk in, in about two minutes." Sirius took of his shirt and Lily took of her dress and threw it on the floor. Sirius wrapped his arms around her and started kissing her neck and sure enough the door opened.

"Oh Sirius" Lily exclaimed as he slid his hand over her chest.

"Oh Lily I love you." Sirius climbed on top of Lily and pretended to slid into her and then move up and down.

"Oh Sirius" Lily smiled up at him because she felt safe with him he smiled back then leaned down and started kissing her neck again.

"Oh Lily." The door snapped shut and then Sirius got of Lily and allowed her to get dressed again and he put his shirt back on. "Thank you Lily."

"Your welcome" Lily finished getting dressed.

Lily walked over to him and she kissed him and then the urge took Sirius over and he picked her up and kissed her. He put her down and pulled her clothes of her and then took his shirt and pants of and took her to the bed and then they lost control. Sirius took Lily home and Lily thanked him and he thanked her. She walked to James room and did not see him there lying on the bed she walked over to his desk and took out a knife and she raised it to her chest. James jumped of the bed and ran over to her and was just about to grab the knife when Lily screamed at the pain of the point of the knife starting to cut through her. James grabbed the knife and threw it to the floor and then he grabbed Lily.

"Why are you doing this to you self Lily?" James looked at the blood running down her dress.

"I did something I thought I would never do. I betrayed you James I lost control I did not know what I was doing and then after I fell so ashamed about it that I have to kill my self so I will not be able to do it again." Lily cried as she got lose from James grasp and went for the knife again James grabbed her and took her to sit down.

"Lily what did you do?" James kneeled in front of her.

"I...I had sex with Si... Sirius." She whispered.

James looked at her and then smiled. "It is okay Lily I did the same thing to you but you did not mean to. I still love you but if you want some time to your self with out sharp objects I will understand."

Lily clutched her chest in pain as she laughed. "Would you mind if I was to be left alone and you can take all sharp things away."

"No I don't mind but if you need me I will be just out side." James got up and walked to the door after picking up the knife. "I love you Lily." Then he slipped out the door.

Lily cried and cried because of what she did. She cried because the pain she felt cause of what she did and the cut on her chest. James walked back in an hour later to find Lily under the covers and asleep and lay next to her and held her in his arms and thought of ways he could take the pain away.

"Lily. Lily" A voice whispered she opened her eyes and looked at the person.

"Ye… Yes." She said still half asleep.

"Come on where going out." James smiled.

"Where?" She asked as she sat up and looked at the bags he packed and raised her eyebrows.

"We are gonna get away from all this for a week." James gave her some clothes to get changed into. As the soft cloth touched her chest she winced.

They left the house and got into a carriage and they left. They arrived at there destination in just under and hour.

"Lily. Where here" James said as he lightly shook Lilly from her sleep.

Lily got out of the carriage and looked around. They were at a beach and there was a huge house way to big for just Lily and James. They walked to the house.

"Oh James this is wonderful." Lily exclaimed as she looked around.

"I though you would like it." James said as he smiled at the look on Lily's face.

"What do you mean James?" Lily stopped looking every where else and looked at James.

"Well this is our new home just your's and mine." Lily jumped for joy and accidentally hit James in the stomach.

"Oh my god im so sorry daring are you alright?" Lily stopped and giggled.

"What's so funny?" James asked as he held his stomach.

"I just sounded like my mother then." Lily giggled and James chuckled. "Hey James you have never mentioned your mother to me ever."

"Well I never knew my mother she died when I was born." A silent tear ran down his check as he turned around and walked away.

Lily stood there and then walked after him and slid her arms under his he turned around and looked at her. "Im sorry James it must be hard for you not to know her and then just suddenly get a new mother." Lily mentally slapped her self for just saying that.

"It is okay Lily. So what do you think of the house do you think it is big enough?" James asked with a smile.

Lily looked around once again. "Can we go look at the bed rooms please?" Lily jumped up and down.

They walked up stairs and looked at the main room and it was huge there was massive four poster bed with black silk sheets and deep purple curtains, a fire place and two huge chairs next to it, a large desk in the corner. They then went to the next room there was a four poster bed in there as well with blue silk sheets and red curtains, a fire place with two chairs. There was a third room as well it had a four poster bed in there as well with dark green silk sheets and dark green curtains, a fire place and a couple of chairs for it.

"SIRIUS" A shrill voice yelled from down stairs. Sirius walked out of his room and down to his mother.

"What?" He said just as angary in his tone of voice.

"What… what. How dare you talk to me like that. I told you that you would be disowned by this family if you were with that Evens girl again. So you can get out of my house." His mother glared at him.

"Oh finally I was wondering how long it would take you to do this" Sirius said sarcastically to her. His mother just stared at him as he turned around and walked up to his room and cam back down a few minutes later with all his clothes.

Sirius walked down the drive way and started to walk to James' home when a carriage pulled up beside him.

"Sirius what are you doing?" A soft voice said from inside.

"Im walking what does it look like. Who are you?" Sirius said as he tried to see who was inside.

"Ha very funny Sirius" Lily said as she pulled the curtain back.

Sirius stared at her. "Lily. Umm I don't know what to say." Sirius smiled.

"Come on get in and we can go" Lily opened the door. Sirius climbed in.

"Where we going?" he asked as he looked at her she was wearing a lovely green dress.

"We are going home Sirius." Lily smiled at him.

"Home, I have a home now? Sirius asked with raised eye brows

Lily laughed at this. "Yes you do. James said if you got kicked out and so you get to live with us."

Sirius smiled. "Thank you."

"For what?" Lily asked.

"I hurt you I know that Lily that is why James took you away." Lily stopped smiling.

Lily spoke in a serious tone. "You did nothing wrong. James understands and we have moved on and so should you."

"Yes Lily" Sirius said as he looked out the window.

They travelled for a while and when they arrived Sirius got out and looked around. Lily showed Sirius to his room they past hers and James' room and James was fast asleep on the bed. Sirius looked around his room and then Lily left him to settle in. Sirius unpacked all his stuff and then walked down stairs for dinner he sat down after grace was said and done he sat at the other end of the table opposite James. Lily was seated next to James. They all ate in silence until James spoke.

"So darling what did you do today?" James asked Lily.

"I did some gardening then I went to get Sirius because of his servants told me in the market that he was being kicked out today." Lily smiled at Sirius. What did you do James?"

"Well not much at all I fell asleep while you were gone and woke up an hour ago." James smiled.

"Sirius how do you like the meal?" Lily asked.

"Oh it is all very good." Sirius replied.

"So what did you do today Sirius?" James asked his friend.

"Well I got kicked out. I walked for a while then came here." Sirius smiled.


	5. hate and forgivness

"Sirius how do you like the meal?" Lily asked.

"Oh it is all very good." Sirius replied.

"So what did you do today Sirius?" James asked his friend.

"Well I got kicked out. I walked for a while then came here." Sirius smiled.

**A/N sorry guys/ gals I had no idea what to write so here is the next chapter.**

A month later.

"Ah I can't help it any more if I don't do some thing to im going to go insane about how I feel" Sirius said out loud.

"Sirius I know how you feel about me and I can't exactly say that I feel the same way if it were allowed I would be with you both but as it I am unable to."

Sirius froze. "Lily I… I already know all that but I have tried desperately to get you out of my head and I can't you have a hold over me and I can help but stay in your hold."

"Stop" Lily said.

Sirius turned around. "I can't stop I need you I want you yet I can not have you" Sirius walked over to her and stood right in front of her. "Lily"

Lily looked up at him and he looked down just as she was about to say some thing he kissed her. She put her arms around his neck and kissed back.

James was watching the whole time from the window he turned slowly away his fists clenched in rage. He walked down stairs. He walked calmly towards them and stood there for a minute. He grabbed hold of Lily's shoulder and turned her around he raised his hand high above her Lily turned her head and waited for the impact of his hand. Sirius threw her to the side and took the hit for her.

"It is not her fault it is mine I kissed her." Sirius said as wiped blood away from his mouth.

"She still kissed you" James said as he glared at her as she got up.

Lily stood there for a bit to gather her self she walked up to James and whispered. "Im sorry"

SLAP

James hit her and she fell to the ground. Lily stood up and glared at him.

"What was that for?" she growled.

James lowered his head in shame. "Im sorry I have over reacted about it all"

"No James you did not just over react about it." Lily walked up to him and looked at him. "If you had only just over reacted you would not have hit me." Lily walked away with her hand on her face.

"James you are an arse" Sirius shouted. "You hurt her" Sirius ran after her and wrapped his arms around her she stopped and buried her head into him. Sirius looked back at James and saw he started walking over to them slowly.

"Lily you have to leave this house you are no longer welcome." James said stiffly.

Lily starred at him then walked away to the house to get all her stuff she stopped at the door not very far away. "You have hurt me James and nothing you do can make me forget it!" she spun around and walked inside

An hour later Lily walked out the front door. Sirius helped to get all her stuff out. They stood there and talked for a bit.

"Lily if I had a home of my own I would let you live there but as it is I don't so where will you stay?" Sirius asked.

"I will go and live in my old home." Lily smiled at him.

"But will you be safe there?"

"I do not know I have no husband and no son any thing can happen to me." Lily looked to the ground.

"Well if you would like I could accompany you to this home of yours" Sirius laughed as lily smiled at the same time as jumping up and down.

"Yes please. You can live there to" Lily hugged Sirius and looked up to the window to see James watching them.

"Sure if that is alright with yo-"

Sirius stopped talking because Lily was standing on her tip toes and kissing him and he enjoyed this and kissed her back. Lily kept the kiss going as she held Sirius head with one hand and looked up at the window to see James was still watching she saw tears roll down his checks.

James mouthed some words to her. "I am sorry Lily, I love you Please don't go I need you here with me." But lily closed her eyes to stop her self from just breaking away from Sirius and going to James.

They pulled apart 5 minutes later. Sirius did a small bow and went to get his belongings from his room. He came back about half an hour later and they were on there way to Lily's home.

"So how far away is this place Lily?" Sirius asked.

"Not far about an hours walk from here" Lily smiled as he groaned.

They got there got to cave Sirius looked confused and looked around.

"Is this all?" He asked.

"Im insulted Sirius every thing is not what it seems." Lily smiled and ducked into the cave Sirius looked even more confused but followed her any way.

They ducked through a crack and Sirius stood there stunned. "This is where you live?"

"Yep this is home. I will set up the spare room for you so you can sleep there." Lily said Sirius nodded his head.

That night after Lily cooked dinner Sirius walked to his room and lay down. He opened his eyes and got a bit of a shock because Lily was standing at his door.

"What?" He asked.

"Nothing, Well it is just I have never seen you close your eyes to sleep." Lily smiled.

"Oh is that all?" he said sounding a little smug.

"Yes that is all" she walked away but she turned around and saw he had closed his eyes again so she walked into his room and stood next to him he suddenly opened his eyes which made Lily jump.

"Yes can I help you?" He asked.

"Yes you can" Lily knelt down on the floor beside his bed and leaned forward so she was close to his face. "You can do this for me" he turned his head and looked at her. She leaned even closer and kissed him. "Come to bed"

"I am in bed why don't you come here?" Sirius smiled.

"But I have a bigger bed." Lily smiled innocently at him as she got up.

Back at James' house he was sitting by the fire place and wondering what Lily was doing but then remembered that she was with his best friend.

"I could KILL HIM!" James yelled.

Sirius got up of his bed and followed her to hers and that is where they stayed all night. In the morning he got up, Lily was already up he walked out to the kitchen and she was sitting there at the table.

He walked up and put his hand on her shoulder. "What is wrong Lily?"

"Nothing" she answered.

Sirius got up and walked away.

Lily turned her head and watched him. "Some times when I say im fine I want some one to look in my eyes and say tell the truth." She whispered to her self.

Sirius turned around. "Did you say something Lily?"

"What? I did not say any thing at all." Sirius raised an eyebrow at her. "I'm fine, honest."

"Ok then." Sirius turned back around and kept walking.

Lily got up and walked out of the cave on sat on the road a black carriage pulled up and the door opened and a hand beckoned her in. Lily got up with out hesitation and climbed in. she looked around.

"James." Lily gasped.

"Hello Lily what are you doing sitting there?" He asked.

"James I have to go."

"What is the rush Lily? You can't keep avoiding me like this."

"Yes I can, watch me."

"You are so stubborn." James said as he grabbed her arm.

"Let me go." Lily said coldly.

"No not until you sit here and talk to me." He said back just as coldly.

"Talk see im talking, what do you want me to talk about? Oh I know how about how you did love me and promised to take care of me oh and all the times you kissed me and said sorry was that all lies as well or the truth."

"Lily." She stopped and looked at him.

James was crying "Why are you crying I am the one who is hurt?"

"I did not come to apologies" James looked closer at her and saw she was crying as well.

"Well then what did you come to do then."

"I came to ask for forgiveness from you and you alone."

"Is that all?"

"You can just do this to me I am sorry for every thing and I want to be forgiven and be your friend again and then maybe in the future something more." James lowered his head.

"A friend sure but I do need time to forgive you I cant do it just like that my heart was broken many times by what you did." Lily put her hand on his arm. "Come inside for a while."

"I can't." he answered

"You can't or won't?" Lily asked.

"Both."

"Fine" Lily got out of the carriage and turned around. "This is a good start to being a friend." James opened his mouth to say some thing but Lily cut him off. "Driver he is ready to go you can he leave now." She just looked at James.

"STOP!" He yelled out and got out of the carriage. "You can go home driver I will walk back later." He walked towards Lily. "Happy"

"Yes." Lily said as she slightly jumped up and down.

"What is he doing here?" Sirius asked as Lily and James walked in.

"He is staying for tea Sirius, so don't be rude."

"You sound just like a mother." Sirius laughed.

Lily turned as she heard James sigh. "Sorry."

"What for?" Sirius asked.

"James never knew his mother."

Sirius Laughed. "James you told that bull shit again did you?"

James smiled. "Yeah I guess so."

Lily looked at them both. "What?"

"James mother died when he was eight years old." Sirius said.

"You lied to me" Lily whispered.

"Im sorry Lily." James said.

Lily ran out of the house and out into the street.

"Lily please stop." Lily turned around and looked at him.

"Bastard"

James walked over to her and then grabbed hold of her and buried his head into her neck.

"What are you doing?" Lily asked confused.

"Doing just some thing before you want me to go away for good"

"What exactly is that?"

"This."

James lifted Lily's head up and kissed her with passion Lily wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed back. Sirius was watching the whole time and smiled.

"Good work James you won her back again." He walked away silently


	6. Together Again

"Doing just some thing before you want me to go away for good"

"What exactly is that?"

"This."

James lifted Lily's head up and kissed her with passion Lily wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed back. Sirius was watching the whole time and smiled.

"Good work James you won her back again." He walked away silently

* * *

James held her close not wanting to let her go ever, wanting it all of it not to be a dream. James woke in the early morning light to feel some one in his arms.

"Oh, what exactly did I do last night?" He asked himself.

Lily moaned and rolled over. James dared not look at the girl or at least he hoped it was a girl. James wriggled to get comfortable.

Lily moaned again then spoke. "Stay still." She whispered.

"Ok Lily." James shook his head. "Ah, what?" this had to be a dream Lily loathed him because he hit her she can't be here it is another one of his fantasies that he had so often hoping she would come back. James closed his eyes wishing that when he woke up it would just be a sheer dream but all together he wished it not to end.

He felt the person kiss his chest as they rolled over. They put there arm over his chest running there hand up and down his side. James shivered.

Lily rolled onto her back and then sat up she stretched and then looked over her shoulder at him. He had his eyes closed. She twisted under the covers and then she leaned down and kissed him his eyes flashed open. Lily jumped as he jumped.

She gently pulled away from him. "What?" she asked softly.

"This is a dream you can't be here or I can't be here" James pushed her to the side and got out of the bed and was about to walk away when he was pulled back down.

Lily started to massage his shoulders and then gave his neck a kiss. She moved from behind him to be in front of him she sat in his lap. "You are here and so am I." James wrapped his arms around her and buried his head into her chest.

"Do I have to wake up from this?" James asked.

"Oh shut up, I will prove you are awake." Lily gave him a kiss. "Sorry"

"For what" but he had need not of asked as Lily pinched him, hard. "OUCH" he pushed Lily off himself and clasped his leg.

Lily got up and walked out of the room and yelled out from the hallway. "DUMB ARSE"

"Gee fowl language from a lady." James snickered as he held his leg.

Lily walked out to the kitchen fuming slightly over James.

"Knock… Knock… can I come in?" Came a voice from behind her, Lily turned around to see who it was.

"Um..." Lily looked up. James father stood in the doorway. "Oh yes sir you may come in after all I am only your servant"

"Lily, you are no longer my servant you are James' and he can do as he wishes with you, you know that."

Lily bowed her head. "Yes sir."

James' father walked over to her and lifted her head up and gave her a kiss on her cheek. "You are doing alright I gather no more nonsense from my son."

"No not really I have lived here for a couple of weeks and James came last night but now won't accept that it is not a dream so now he is sitting in bed trying to wake up after I pinched him."

James' father laughed. "You pinched him?" Lily nodded. "Which way to the room he is in?" Lily pointed down the hallway. He walked down the hallway and stood in the door way.

James kept his eyes closed. "This is a dream you are not here." he said out loud as he heard the foot steps.

"Yes I am my boy now you will get out of that bed and give your wife to be a kiss for god sake."

James fell out of the bed and stood up with the blankets on his head. "Father" James said but was muffled by the blankets but it sounded more like Fafher. James pulled the blankets off.

James father laughed as his son walked towards him. James hugged his father "She does not deserve me father"

"Let her judge that James she is the only one that can judge you not me." James nodded.

Lily walked into the room. "Sorry to intrude on this conversation but breakfast is ready James. Lord Potter would you like some thing to eat?"

Oh yes please if it is not to much bother." Lord Potter said.

"No bother, James what would you like?" Lily asked.

"Um, any thing please"

"Ok" Lily walked out of the room.

Lord Potter turned and glared at James, James sighed. "Lily"

Lily walked back in. "Yes James."

"Come here." Lily raised an eyebrow but walked over to him. James wrapped his arms around her waist. "Thank you Lily."

Lily rested her head on his chest. "You are welcome James" she slowly got out of his hold and placed her hand on his chest. "Come on or breakfast will get cold." She grabbed James' hand and led him out. Lord Potter walked ahead of them. Lily stopped and James turned to face her. She stood on her tiptoes and gave him a kiss. "Was that real enough for you?"

James shook his head Lily was about to walk away when he kissed her and deepened it licking at her lips begging for entrance Lily allowed him entrance and James moaned as she did.

Some one coughed from behind them they pulled apart. "You know when you have a guest that's not a good thing to do."

Lily blushed. "Sorry Sir."

James smiled. "Sorry Father." James nudged Lily and he smiled. "That was real." James said as he held her close.

Lily smiled. "Thank you"

After breakfast Lord Potter left His son and Lily alone to do what they wished as he headed on home. Lily walked silently to the bedroom and lay down on the bed and rolled over looking at the ceiling she sighed then closed her eyes and thought about every thing that happened.

It all had to be test for them to see if they were stronger than there fears are or ever were. James walked into the room and froze he smiled as he walked over to the bed and sat down next to Lily he put his hand onto her stomach and rub it around in a circle. Lily moaned and rolled over one to her side but James kept his hand on her side.

"Lily, are you alright?" James asked.

Lily opened her eyes. "Yer im just tired and need to close my eyes when you started to rub my stomach I was about to fall asleep."

"Huh that made no sense Lily." James rolled her over to look at her face.

"Can you do it again?"

"What, this" James moved to lye next to her and he started to rub he stomach in circles again with in a short period of time she was asleep.

* * *

"James are we going now or not, you can stay if you want but I want to go home." Lily said impatiently.

"Coming." James picked his bag up as well as Lily's bag and they walked out the door and to the carriage awaiting them outside.

They got out at the mansion and went inside.

Lily looked around. "I forgot how beautiful it was here."

James looked around as well. "Yes I forgot as well."

Lily looked at him confused. "What do you mean you did live here while I was not here?"

James looked at Lily. "It lost all beauty when you left and now it seems more alive than ever."

"James have you been hit over the head how can you not see the beauty of it all even if im not here." Lily asked him.

"I don't know I just did not." James answered in all honesty as he shrugged.

Lily walked to the bed room and put her stuff down. James walked into the room and walked up behind her and picked her up and spun her around. Lily laughed and held on to him.


End file.
